Saturday, April 19, 2014

So You Are Bringing Your Boy/Girl Friend Home

You and your significant other (SO) decided that you're at the point where you get to meet each other's parents. It is such a big step and sometimes it is not easy to pull off so I am giving you some do's and don't of bringing your boo home. 

Do: Prepare your parents.
Don’t: Just drop in on them announcing your new boo 
You don't have to give them the whole rundown of your relationship but give them a little background about him/her. Obviously you're serious enough about this person to take this step. Show them that you're serious by 

Do: Prepare your significant other.  Give him/her information about who s/he is meeting.
Don't: Make him/her nervous. 
My mom is a little intimidating. I didn't tell my husband that before they met because that would have made him more nervous. It is important for you SO to know that your mom has a different last name from you (because your SO should first address your 'rents as Mr. and Mrs LastName until otherwise directed by them). Give your boo tips, does your dad love talking about food? Did you mom just win an award at work? 

I don’t suggest you attempt the first meeting over dinner. Breaking bread with people is intimate and some people have weird food issues. But if you insist on dinner...

Do: Go to a restaurant- a restaurant that you frequent often. You want your SO to feel comfortable as possible and if they have those weird food issues they know this menu well.  Bonus points if your SO picks up the tab.
Don’t: Go over your mom’s house for Sunday dinner. It’s awkward going to someone’s house for the first time and then there is the food issues thing. If you have strong family tradition it could make someone feel like an outsider. 
Bonus Don't: Get drunk or let your SO get drunk. Whatever you do refrain from getting tipsy, lit, toasted or whatever. Nerves and alcohol are a very bad combination. Bad things happen. 

Do: Think outside the box for a first meeting
Don't: Go to a sporting event if your family is ride or die for their team.
Something really cool (and casual) for a first meeting is an trying an activity like miniature golf, bowling, AAA baseball game, carnival, or a museum. Somewhere where the pressure isn't so focused on getting-to-know each other. This is especially helpful if your family like to "grill" your suitors. 

Do: Let the conversation happen naturally
Don't: "Mom did you know that _____ graduated from your alma mater." 
Forced conversations are terrible. If the conversation is not flowing naturally, you do the talking and casually try to bring others in the conversation. 

Do: Pick a regular day to bring your SO home
Don't: Pick a holiday
Holiday's are already stressful enough without adding the pressure of meeting the family. 

Do: Dress Appropriately
Don't: Over Do It.
Make sure the both of you are dressed for the occasion. No club gear, going out make-up, saggy pants, gym clothes, or formal ballgowns. 

Don't Be late without a phone call. 
Actually this is a life lesson. You should always strive to be on time in every situation. 

Do: Have fun
Don't: Stress yourself out. 
Keep it light and casual. Most parents just want their kids to be happy. Show them that this person makes you happy. If is doesn't go well don't be discouraged. What tends to happen is people try to force their family to like their SO. It may take awhile to your family to warm up to them. 

Just like on Meet the Parents

1 comment:

Gods Son said...

Awesome!! And so true..!