Thursday, August 30, 2007

I agree

DEAR MARGO: This is a dumb guy question, but why do people get married? The institution seems hopelessly outdated. This concept of being with one woman for the rest of your life is totally unnatural from a man's perspective.
The irony is that after a certain length of time being married, most men report being reasonably happy (most lobotomy recipients would probably classify themselves the same way), while a majority of women report themselves miserable. So I'm extrapolating that the concept of marriage works for neither party in the long run. We all know the high cost of divorce as well.
I guess if you want to have kids, it makes sense. What say you?
--- ERIK

Dear Erik:


In case you wanted the real answer:

DEAR ER: Well, people get married for lots of reasons. Among them, love, sex, security, status, other people's expectations or even revenge. We're in quasi-quicksand on this one, because many cultural anthropologists say that it is not in the male's nature to be faithful -- and yet, there are many such marriages.
As for "miserable women," who knows how they would feel were they single? Not to beg the question, but I know of marvelous marriages, along with some you'd think were a punishment from God. If this were more than an idle question, I would say that marriage is for you if you think it is.
To quote an English essayist from a few centuries ago on the subject of remarriage, "It is the triumph of hope over experience." Perhaps the real answer is that men and women, since time began, have wanted to be together, and to be recognized as being together.


Tuesday, August 14, 2007


Friendships are probably the most rewarding relationships we have. They are the family you pick. Ever meet someone and fall them immediately? You’re instant friends. You hang out, chill, talk all the time and share intimate details. You forget that you really don’t know each other. That is of course until someone comes along and shakes it. Someone has infected one of my newest dearest friendships with a disease called mistrust. I wonder if we’re going to handle it well. Maybe after tomorrow it’ll all blow over. True friendship can fight through any disease.

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Old Self meet New Friends

The other day I did something that several years ago I would not have given a second thought to. However my “new” friends (by new I mean people who have only known me for 5 years or less) were shocked.

I was going to mount a total defense of my actions. I wasn’t wrong. It was harmless. Yada Yada Yada. But the truth is…it WAS wrong. It was a victimless crime but still wrong. It’s hilarious because my 17 year old self laughed and enjoyed it all. It was a small victory for the immature me I left behind a long time ago. My 26 year-old friends haven’t met that girl. I think they were disappointed. They expect more from me.

I wonder if they knew me then, would they like me. Would we even be friends? By the looks on their faces, I doubt it. I feel lucky that I was able to reinvent myself and that I have grown so much. Still, I do enjoy letting my “child at heart” come out and play-even if she’s a little bad!